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You will need someone to clean the house; a lot of people will be coming in and out and it gets messy. Someone to cook for all of you. Someone to schedule all the needed services. Shopping for food, household items. Etc. etc. etc.
Choose a care facility instead. Mom will be better off and you will too. You’ll still have plenty to do to help mom.
To answer your question, Hospice has been recommended so Rehab is probably not in the picture. Mom probably can't do the therapy. So its Hospital to a facility.
I see there is a hospice *something* near you - it's not clear if it's a facility or agency. Whichever it is, someone there should be able to help you make proper arrangements that will benefit your whole family.
Hospice Of Eastern Connecticut
34 Ledgebrook Dr
Mansfield Center, CT 06250-1664 (Tolland)
(860) 456-7288
Stick to the fact that while you agree with the palliative and hospice recommendations hospice no longer provides any in home support other than RN visit once a week, and a aid to bathe the patient a few times a week. Make it CLEAR THAT YOU WANT PLACEMENT with Hospice and Palliative care, and that you yourself cannot do in home care for both mental and physical limitations.
The process can be long and daunting. No reason you cannot start looking for NH's now and having the benefit of time to look at several choices. When you have to make this kind of huge decision on the fly, it's often the case that you just grab the first available place.
You will find that Hospice at home is draining if you don't have a large support group you can lean on. And even tho Hospice is supposed to be EOL care, EOL can be a day or more than a year. Our situation with my MIL is that she was placed in Hospice almost a year ago and we were told she wouldn't last 3 weeks. She's still here and making life very miserable for a lot of people.
The other day my DH said that 2023 was the 'worst year of his life'. And this man had liver cancer and a liver transplant 17 years ago--taking care of his mother has been worse, in his POV.
You are smart to recognize that this is going to be a difficult situation. So many people think they are obligated to care for their elderly LO's in home--it can be done, but IMHO, is very. very hard.