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You could point out, too, that wanting to be allowed to die with dignity, not being poked with needles or forced into hospital, should not mean that she has to put up with vomiting and feeling terrible. Symptoms like this can be treated just as well at home.
My mother’s cancer metastasised to her abdomen and she had frequent bowel movements but very little nausea – probably much the same level of cleaning up. It was very helpful to have the doctor for medications, particularly for morphine in the final stages which might otherwise have been quite painful. The local pharmacist was also helpful, with a home delivery service and fuss-free sympathy. There are no ‘wrong’ decisions unless they cause pain, so there is nothing to be afraid of in a home death, but I would suggest that you have a sensible GP who is prepared to home visit when needed. It also makes the death certificate straightforward if the doctor knows what is happening.
If you benefit from the death in any way, could be a minefield for you.
You are not actually a family member, right? She’s a neighbor?
So where is this persons family in all this?
Once a person refuses treatment for a "life limiting condition" the person is probably Hospice eligible.
And do not call just 1 Hospice call a few and "interview" them. Just like you would research a new doctor for yourself, buy a car, or book a vacation package you need to compare what they have to offer. Look at reviews then make a decision. Many times people do not have the option to pick and choose but if you can do so.
Hospice can make keeping your loved one at home possible with the right equipment and supplies. Having a Nurse come in at least 1 time a week, a CNA a few times a week, and the availability of a Social Worker, Chaplain, other therapies as well as volunteers that can come in and help.
And the choice to go on Hospice is not a permanent one if they or you decide later that this was the wrong choice you can go off Hospice at any time. And you can go back on if you so desire.
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