By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or
[email protected] to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our
Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our
Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Does he work? Who takes care of his mother while he is out of the house (if she needs care)? Why can't he get away for a "date" at least some nights? If she needs care, is he working toward arranging that for her, or does he plan to do this the rest of her life?
As others have said, stepping in to help a parent after a traumatic loss is admirable. It is the long-term plans that would be most important to your relationship. Can you tell us more about the situation? How is his mother's health, for example?
But you don't say how long the relationship has been going, when your b/f's father passed away, or what ages any of the involved parties are; and not to pry but we also, of course, have no idea what left you feeling apparently "once bitten" about relationships beforehand.
So all in all...
The main question is how long ago the father passed away. If it was less than - what would we say, three months? Six months? A year? - and if the mother was fond of him, and especially if she has other health issues too, then it could be either that you'll need more stamina or that you should agree to part before there are too many hard feelings.
If you feel this gentleman is "the one", please give the relationship some time, and give him some breathing room. He has a lot to figure out and challenges ahead. Do not put any demands on him.
Ask him what you can do to help. He would greatly appreciate that. And be thankful he is the type of man to wishes to help out his Mom. That would mean he would be a great caregiver if there is a time in the future when you need help.
And also think, what if the tables were turned, and you needed to take care of a parent.