By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or
[email protected] to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our
Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our
Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
You cannot continue to do a good job as a caregiver (or anything else) if you are continuously sleep deprived. That is just a biological fact. So, that is the issue that needs addressing first.
Freqflyer's suggestion of separate bedrooms might work if your husband is safe on his own. My husband (dementia) was not. If he was awake I needed to be aware of it. Dementia definitely reaches a point where the person cannot be left alone -- not while you go to a store and not while you are sleeping. If your husband hasn't reached this point yet, take advantage of that and sleep in separate rooms.
You say that sleeping meds don't work on him. That is too bad, because that was ultimately what allowed me to keep my husband home with me. The drug that worked for us -- seroquel -- isn't exactly a "sleeping med" but my husband's doctors (a sleep psychiatrist and a neurologist, working together) understood the critical nature of him sleeping through the night, and were willing to try this. Have you discussed this problem with both the doctor who treats the dementia and the doctor who prescribed the bi-pap? Impress upon them the critical nature of this issue. Maybe some sleeping meds haven't worked, but be sure you've fully explored this avenue before giving up on it.
We used a pill for excessive daytime drowsiness, too. A pill to sleep, then a pill to stay awake. May sound crazy ... but it gave us 9 good years of a quality life together. I am extremely grateful to the doctors who fought hard for quality of life for my husband.
Dementia messes with the sleep/wake cycles. It robs people of initiative. I'm all in favor of any means to help them overcome these problems, which are not their fault and not character flaws.
If Hubby cannot sleep through the night, cannot be more active in the day, and is not safe to leave alone at night, what are your other options?
1) Bring in a night time helper. He or she should start about the time you go to bed (in a separate bedroom) and just be responsible for keeping your husband safe.
2) Sign him up for a day health program. That would be a few hours a week he is not in front of the television.
3) When the night aide and some daytime activity are not enough, consider placement in a care center.
My heart really goes out to you. I've been there myself and I am so glad that we found a solution that enabled me to continue to care for my husband at home. I sincerely hope that you do, too.
Please keep us updated. Many people are in your shoes, and we learn from each other.