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Apparently someone messed up with communications between the funeral home and the cemetary.
I won’t even go there. And I expect others have also learned a lesson, but it was her schizophrenic husband’s wish that she be buried there. His brother was able to get him in to sign paperwork.
I also learned that while everyone warns us to get prepaid funerals........ no one tells us that the cemetary is the expensive part !
This has nothing to do with the insurance policy vs cash. They are required by law to get permission from the legal next of kin, that is her husband.
Ask if they have a form that he can sign to give you the authority to handle the disposal of her remains or can you take the consent for burial to your BIL with a notary. He doesn't have to be present to deal with this.
I would fill the form out and bring the notary to him, making it hard for him to back out of taking responsibility to get this dealt with. I would tell him that he has to sign or his beautiful wife will be cremated by the state and flushed down the sewer, they will not hold her indefinitely dear BIL. This is what happens where I live and the family doesn't take care of business within 3 months.
Best of luck getting the paperwork signed to lay your sister to rest.
As you seem to be in charge of all of this, it seems it is up to you ow whether to pay an extra 8,000 to lay your sister to rest.
You can have a celebration of life at your home for those who wish to come. Have them bring the food.
If you are paying for this funeral and making choices it is unlikely that the executor of the will will reimburse you for something they had no part in arranging. I would back out at this point and let other members of the family make these choices and take the responsibility.
Who made the decision on what funeral home to use? They can carry on with the rest of it, and arrange the billing to the executor if they are willing. What do you bet they want YOUR money up front.
I think the funeral home and the cemetery will wait until the insurance pays out to receive their money. As soon as you get that Death Certificate, call the Insurance Company.