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Someone needs a POA or Guardianship. They have dementia or Alzheimer's. You are told by attorneys, I didn't say all, that because they have this mental condition, they cannot assist you with it, that you waited too long.
However, the truth is you can obtain in many states a durable power of attorney even though the person has AD. It can be crushing to find this out too late. Quite often the person has many lucid moments and always remembers you in their past and so forth. You will find this in law books, if you cannot get a lawyer to state it. I recommend you keep looking till you find a lawyer who will help you get a Durable POA. I'm assuming you would be qualified for it under the law.
I was a caregiver for 25 years. It's horrible to see people try to assign 100% mental disability to somebody who can recognize you, talk about all her siblings, mom and dad, grandparents, her favorite songs. We need more good lawyers out there willing to fight for what is right and fear about it be damned.
It's time to stand up for those who can't stand up for themselves. NOW!
A durable financial POA is critical to allowing you upon execution of the documents (signed/notarized) to step in and take over on all financial matters. This give you rights to bank account management if NOT on joint accounts now. Ditto for retirement-related accounts (Social Security, pension, 401K, IRA, etc.) so that if you need to take minimum distributions or use the funds for care, you may do that. This allows you to sign and file State and Federal taxes on their behalf. To sell any asset (home, car, stocks/bonds, CD, any other tangible asset) that may need to be sold in order to generate funds for your LO's care. To make funeral arrangements, to pay lawyers (such as the elder care lawyer hired to execute these documents or to handle any Medicaid applications as needed or end of life planning: Will, Trusts, etc.).
The media POA allows you to take charge of your LO's medical care; which doctors are or are not part of the care team, where your LO resides (which nursing home, memory care facility, etc. and so sign any admission paperwork for such facilities), to agree to medical procedures and/or tests OR NOT, or when to end life sustaining care and instead move to hospice or only palliative care.
Without these documents properly executed for your State's laws and before a dementia diagnosis generally (in most States) is rendered are imperative to allowing you to essentially take over on all matters for your LO.
For both documents a successor can be also named. So if you get hit by a buss, and are no longer able to do this, serve as your LO's agent in these matters, then who then takes over? An adult child, the attorney (another option) or other person?
Talk with your area agency on aging or a quality Medicare/Medicaid memory care facility business office staff (they tend to know who the reputable players are in the elder care legal space) or your State Bar Assn to see who is a practicing elder care attorney who handles these matters, as well as Medicaid long term care nursing home coverage qualification (if that might need to come into play) and other end of life estate planning matters.
Good luck with this.
2. Get two POAs: Medical POA and financial POA. They are not the same.
If your spouse has already been diagnosed with dementia, it may be difficult to get a POA, because it could be argued in court that your spouse is not able to appoint a rep due to the illness.
Good luck.
A DURABLE power of attorney becomes active the day it is signed. It does not need to be approved at a later date. The 'agent' (also known as 'attorney in fact') named in the document can immediately start performing actions and making decisions in the place of the impaired person.
A SPRINGING power of attorney becomes active when a doctor gives a diagnosis that the person is cognitively incapacitated and can no longer conduct their own affairs.
A DURABLE power of attorney is going to be more useful and convenient. If documents have not already been signed, get a durable power of attorney. Go to a real lawyer for that, not a doctor.
In order for a lawyer to draw up the document, your husband needs to be oriented enough to understand he is in a lawyer's office and understand that the document he is signing gives you the ability to conduct transactions in his name.
The lawyer will not ask to see any medical proof of your husband's mental status. The lawyer uses their own professional judgement based on your husband's behavior in the lawyer's office that day.
Before your husband signs anything, you make sure the document has all the language you need, giving the 'agent' (you) as much authority as possible to conduct all types of transactions and make all types of decisions. For that, you might be looking at 10 pages detailing all types of transactions.
You should contact the lawyer first, on your own, to specify what you want. The lawyer should email you a draft to read before bring your husband in to sign.
Then think about what will help your husband go along with the process. A male or female lawyer? A large formal office (looks legit but could feel intimidating), or a smaller informal office (nice casual atmosphere, friendly people).
The day before you bring your husband to the lawyer to sign the document, get him a haircut, a new shirt. Make sure he's carrying a wallet like a competent person (even if there are only discount cards in the wallet).
Good luck.
The POA was incredibly important. It gave permission to the doctors, hospitals and all health care providers for me to make decisions on his behalf for his care. It also was necessary for the bank and even the utility company and when his daughter (23 years old) was trying to get his car titled to her. My niece was secondary POA and my other brother third. She lives in the same area as he was—I live 1600 miles away. So when it came time to arrange for the cremation and hospice care, I’d be on speaker phone as she was signing the paperwork. Taking care of your loved one would be a train wreck if you didn’t have a POA. I think it’s a good idea to have more than one POA listed.
POA occurs BEFORE the person is incapacitated and s/he appoints someone to represent them on their behalf when needed.
CAG occurs AFTER the person has been found incapacitated by 2 doctors and has no POA. The court then appoints a lawyer to be that person’s CAG.
The two legal tools are executed at two different points in time, depending on the person’s situation. If anything, the POA has power over CAG, not the other way around.
Maybe there are certified estate planning attorneys in here to educate us all.
Every state may (likely) is different.
I believe many here will tell you this.
If finances are an issue, there are 'legal aid' in some counties that could help.
* Talk to your bank / investment institutions. They have their own forms, too" (or might).
FYI: While I am a POA for a friend, the VA doesn't recognize it as an official legal document so I needed to become his fiduciary which seems to have more / other safety procedures in place to protect the intended person being cared for.
I know I should end a sentence with a preposition ...
Gena
Touch Matters
If on the other hand you already have some of these documents in place they may be telling you that your husband has reached the threshold for using the durable or springing POA and they will verify this with the form he handed you whenever you want or need. Again I would get clearer on what he is actually saying and suggesting before taking any other steps and this may require asking him the questions rather than expecting him to tell you all the specifics for some legal reason too. Maybe he’s telling you to get these things covered without saying it so as not to agitate your husband, it’s just hard to say. A treating psychiatrist is not the typical person to set these things up so it seems obvious to me that this doctor is trying to help you and communicate the importance of timing here.
There r many POA.. they can be customized. They r state dependent... There is a health care POA. And I concerned u not have the financial resources for laywer?
Call 2-1-1 to talk to someone who can direct u to local resources u need.
You can find out a lot online by researching POA under your own state as rules vary state to state.
I surely wish you good luck.
In California where I am, they need to be notarized, too, so you don't just sign one and you're good to go.
Banks in particular are very fussy about POAs and want you to use their paberwork, so get to your bank and deal with it now, too. (You still do your own POA, but just make sure the bank is OK with what you've got.)
If your husband can't understand what he's signing, then it's all moot and he can't grant POA, but you still need it for yourself, so get them done.
My folks waited a tad too long to do all of that and my mom wasn't 100% competent, but not obviously so. She was able to say she wanted Dad and me to oversee her care. Their attorney knew them well enough to realize that none of us were trying to steal their money or wanted anything but to care for them, so he did the POAs with me as my dad's (he was fine healthwise) and as the back-up for my mom. It was a good thing, too, as Dad was the one who died first, so I was able to take over Mom's care seamlessly.
Here is your challenge if the answer is fill in the blanks. For your husband (principal) to grant you (agent) a DPOA he must be able to understand what he is signing at the time he signs it. You CAN NOT sign it, not if you will be his agent. That is per the Iowa (paraphrased) Statute. Chapter 633B.
I recommend that you go to www.legis.Iowa.gov and search CH 633B it is 25 pages of your states laws that explain how your POA laws work. It sounds daunting but, it is a pretty easy read.
Thankfully you have a doctor that is willing to help you. I would trust the documents he gave you, this obviously isn't his first rodeo.
Reading the laws governing your responsibility as POA will give you confidence in handling this role and I have found that to be immensely valuable as so many people think they know and make your life hard.
Here they is "Standing" (good as soon as signed) and "Springing" (requires some threshold to be met before it is activated).