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If you are applying to rent an independent living apartment, it is normal to be asked to provide information about your income, just as you would to any landlord. Also, as someone else has mentioned, a reputable community would not want to rent to someone who cannot afford to pay for more than a short time. No one wants to see an elderly person have to move out because they can't afford to stay.
The community doesn't have 'control over your finances'. In fact, other than folks who are using Medicaid to pay their rent in nursing facilities, I can't think of any senior living arrangement where your finances would be 'controlled'. You may choose to have your rent automatically deducted from your bank account, but that would hardly be considered giving up control.
However, if you feel like the community you visited is being deceptive in some way, perhaps you should move on and look somewhere else, or bring someone with you to help sort through the application process.
In what way did it seem like they would be taking control?
Being an R.N., still working in the field, as well as a care taker for my husband & having had 2 of my children die in the past 2 to 5 years , both disabled & both died at age 39. I wonder where I will end up sometime but I keep so busy with everything-all gifts I have been given.
My 2 daughter's (RIP) when ever they got together would talk in front of me, "What will happen to mom?" I use to tell them," I will be forever so stop this talking...", but they wanted to know that I would be cared for. Now they are with me in Spirit & VERY REAL to me. Don't know what will happen to me but I am too busy to think of it now.
I do know that professionally, there are many good adult living complexes, homes & other places to go to. Have you considered getting help into your home to help you instead of leaving it all behind?? Just a thought.
I deal with attempting to keep people in their homes as long as possible & you so sound as if your mentally OK. There are so many alternatives for you out there & keep on this site. It is a good site with loving folks out here that can add to your decisions.
Blessings are you.