By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or
[email protected] to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our
Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our
Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Your mom could have lived into her 90s, had this car accident not occurred, but she also could have developed cancer or dementia rendering those last years miserable.
Your mom died happy and living life on HER terms. You should be happy about that and proud of yourself for not impeding her lifestyle. Nothing you DID or did not do caused her death.
My deepest condolences on the loss of your dear mom.
GUILT has no part in the loss of your mother. She was in a car accident.. you were not involved. DO NOT PICK UP THE GUILT CARD.,
Talk to your mom. Thank her for being your mom and a wonderful person and role model.
i know a retired fireman. Most accidents involving older people will automatically be blamed for the accident. More times than not, they were not at fault.. I hope and pray someone didn’t stick the blame on her just because she was older..
muse this time to say goodbye to mom. Share fun stories.. look at the good and fun times with her..
take that emotion of guilt, give it to God, and ask him to fill it with love, caring, life. You did not cause that.
prayers
I am sorry for your loss
You have said you did what you could do at the time. You need to accept that and move throough the grieving process. Your mother would not want this for you and your blaming yourself does her no honor. She would want you to move on with a quality life, knowing just how short it can be.
Your Mom had a good life. I am sorry that she is gone. Grieving her loss is a normal thing that has no answers, that must be "got through". If you need help do go for grief support and grief counseling which can be done on line, in person, or in groups. If there are none, try to arrange some through your community or faith based groups.
Again, I am so sorry for this loss. You are not alone in your loss or in your feelings. Time alone is, to my mind, the great healer. You will always have some feelings about this, but concentration of a celebration of a life well lived, having to give up very little, and having your support was to my mind a good life.
You need to look at the fun times you and Mom had. Rejoice in that she was healthy and able to enjoy life. You have nothing to feel guilty about. Its grief that your experiencing.
It sounds like you and your mother had a very close bond. I’m sure she felt very lucky to have such a caring child. 😊
Please accept my condolences for the loss of your beloved mom.
You did do your best, and you said yourself that your mom was overall healthy and happy, and that is a blessing for sure, as a lot of folks as they get older are in poor health and miserable.
Your mom left this world just as God intended, in good health and happy, knowing she had a great daughter who loved her dearly.
It's better than the alternative where you perhaps would have had to go years with her suffering and miserable and in poor health where you could do nothing to change it.
Our time here on earth is written in God's Book of Life, and it was your moms time to go be with Him. You now have another angel who will be looking out for you until you meet again.
But in the meantime, please seek out a Grief Share group in your area, to help you sort out what you're feeling.
May God bless you and keep you, and give you His peace in the days, weeks and months ahead.
Yes we are all born to die but surely god is not prolonging the suffering and agony of all human beings who are slowly and painfully dying just because their date of death isn't up yet. That would be cruel and inhumane and certainly something more align with a serial killer rather than a just, and loving god.
The reality is that the human body is programmed to live even in the most seemingly gruesome and painful of circumstances. It is the bodies job to keep the host alive at any and all costs to the human being residing in said body.
Why would the OP feel guilty about mom dying in a car accident? How is a car accident death the OP's fault for not taking better care of her mother? Is it because mom was unsafe behind the wheel and the OP feels like they should have done more to take moms keys away from her?
That isn't on OP if that is why she feels the guilt for this. Sometimes it take a little bit to get an elder to stop driving and OP can't blame themselves but they can be glad mom didn't kill an innocent person if this scenario is why OP is feeling guilty.
If you believe she is in Heaven now, stop and consider how she feels. Is she looking at your soul— because now she can see your true heart, even better than you can— and angry at you? Blaming you? NO! Her life here ended but her love cannot end; it’s not possible! Don’t put limits on her love by torturing your own dear soul. I can’t imagine she would be okay with you feeling what is ultimately not true.
I think when people blame themselves for a death, it’s because they just can’t yet accept their loved one ‘chose’ to leave them. You weren’t ready, but no one is ever ready to lose a parent. It takes time to accept that SHE was ready, that it was her time, and she wouldn’t leave if she didn’t think you’d be okay. ❤️
You did not cause that accident . Sounds as if you were taking excellent care of your mother .
You are a loving caring daughter .
I’m sure your mother appreciated everything you did .
A car accident can happen to anyone at any time .
You are not guilty , you did nothing wrong . It is common to have the “ If only ….” in the beginning of grieving .
Have you thought of going for grief counseling ?
So sorry for your loss! I lost my father in April.
(((hugs)))