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I hate having to care for him after many years of not being cared for or provided for by him."
How do you plan to take any types of trips with a husband in such a condition, I guess I don't understand? If there is an urgent need to travel, I'd hire a nurse to travel with you and to take care of him along the way, or hire medical transportation for him. Otherwise, you'd have way too much to deal with, trying to care for a mostly bed bound man with double incontinence issues, and such trips would become hellish for you, I would think. If you're on a plane, 2 people can't fit into the lavatory on board, so changing a brief would be impossible. If he were to have a BM on a plane, he'd have to sit in it for the length of the trip, and everyone on board would have to bear the odor emanating from his soiled brief. Not a great idea, unless you hire a nurse to deal with all of it.
If you're traveling in a car, you'd need to find a restroom to accompany him into. But again, if he has such mobility issues, it doesn't make sense to me how you'd be able to manage him alone w/o help of some kind. Nor why you'd want to take any trips at all with a doubly incontinent elder, unless there was an urgent need to do so. Then I'd look into hiring medical transportation or a nurse to go along with you.
Good luck.
My wife, now an ex, left me alone day after day, I had to fix my own breakfast. Incontince was minor compared to most, but still she complained about "cleaning up your sh**".
Praise god my a*s.
- Knowing the route, where the public toilets are (disabled facilities if you need extra space to help)
- Bringing a urinal bottle to use instead.
- Easy trousers, no fiddly belts - eg elastic waisted.
If past that stage & incontinent then *aim to contain*. This is what the Continence Clinic RN advised;
- If mobility good, take a change bag: wipes, rubbish bags, spares (pull-ups/pads/clothing). Cleanup & change as required in public disabled bathrooms.
- If mobility poor, have to return home for cleanup. Consider falls risk + injury to caregiver. Take a supply bag: wipes, jumper, blanket. Jumper to tie around waist (for walkers) & blanket to throw over lap (in wheelchair) to hide the mishap. Then exit.
- Talk to Doctor about suitability of longer term solutions eg catheters & leg bags.
- Consider getting as many appointments as possible via telehealth/phone. Obviously many have to be in person eg podiatrists, wound checks. Try for services that can visit.
- Consider having an Aide accompany when out.
For me, double incontinence was my limit. After some car seat puddles I insisted pullups be used & I placed protection pad on seat. I stopped providing transport after the first double incontinence in public.
We travel to outpatient therapies and make short trips, changing him in public bathrooms. He is double incontinent, right side paralysis but can stay standing with support and supporting self on wheelchair back. So I change him standing up and throw diaper in plastic grocery bag.
It takes planning and bringing along supplies and clothes change. If a diarrhea day, we alter plans.
Thanks again. Stroke stricken individuals need to be seen and need to go see.
There comes a time when traveling for pleasure is done.
If it's necessary travel, then take the suggestions below about hiring nurses and medical transportation.
they make a female version too.
Are you asking this in reference to upcoming holidays? You do not need to go.
Of course the depends will need to be used and if male pt. someone male will need to be with you to go into make restroom to help change as needed( that is if the pt is ambulatory).
The more dignity and self respect can be maintained with minimal to no travel unless you hire a male caregiver or have make relative to assist and IF patient is able to be cooperative and compliant.
Practice good self care.....you are impt too...
I hate having to care for him after many years of not being cared for or provided for by him."
How do you plan to take any types of trips with a husband in such a condition, I guess I don't understand? If there is an urgent need to travel, I'd hire a nurse to travel with you and to take care of him along the way, or hire medical transportation for him. Otherwise, you'd have way too much to deal with, trying to care for a mostly bed bound man with double incontinence issues, and such trips would become hellish for you, I would think. If you're on a plane, 2 people can't fit into the lavatory on board, so changing a brief would be impossible. If he were to have a BM on a plane, he'd have to sit in it for the length of the trip, and everyone on board would have to bear the odor emanating from his soiled brief. Not a great idea, unless you hire a nurse to deal with all of it.
If you're traveling in a car, you'd need to find a restroom to accompany him into. But again, if he has such mobility issues, it doesn't make sense to me how you'd be able to manage him alone w/o help of some kind. Nor why you'd want to take any trips at all with a doubly incontinent elder, unless there was an urgent need to do so. Then I'd look into hiring medical transportation or a nurse to go along with you.
Good luck.
I was needing advice on how, if possible, to handle travel with him. I don't think it will work.
Thank you for your advice.
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