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After trying all the major bladder spasms medications, having Botox put in his bladder, and none of that working, it was finally decided by his urologist to put in a supra pubic catheter(a permanent one)which was such a Godsend as we were finally after 9 months able to sleep through the night, and all I had to do was empty his catheter bag once in the morning and once at night.
2 months later my husband developed aspiration pneumonia, sepsis and septic shock and almost died. After returning home from the hospital, he was completely bedridden in our living room, where I kept a bedside commode next to his hospital bed. I did have to hire an aide to get him out of the bed and put him on the commode so he could poop, and then she would hold him up so I could clean him up and put his diaper back on, and then she would get him back to bed. I was very fortunate that my husband 95% of the time was a morning pooper, so having the aide here during that time worked out well.
You may have to hire some outside help to come in to assist you, as I can tell you first hand that not getting proper sleep is very hard on not only you, but your spouse as well.
And make sure that you're getting sound advice from your spouses urologist and PCP as to what can best help them.
Best wishes.
It uses a continous small suction throughout night and is connected to a small hotdog apparatus that she puts in her panties against her vulva. As she sleeps, she urinates and the urine is taken to a holding bottle which you empty in morning!
It is nothing short of a miracle !!!
The wands are expensive if bought directly from company $20 apiece, but Liberator, sells them for about $7 a piece, the machine runs about $400...
Good luck! This saved our lives!
The Purewick system is a good one, as mentioned below. Replacement wands can be purchased on eBay for less.
Respite care is available at an Assisted Living Facility in your neighborhood where you can send your wife for a week or 2 while you rest and recuperate. Look into it.
Have a plan in place for long term care for your wife if she continues to decline.
Best of luck.
I would call her Dr concerning this minor surgery and tell him she is worse than before the surgery. That you are not able to do the physical caring of her. She needs to be as dependent as she can be.
Is she using a walker to get to the bathroom? If not she should be. Maybe ask Dr if he can make an order for in home PT and OT. The therapist can evaluate her and determine what her needs are. Maybe do some strength exercises. You should get an aide to bathe your wife. Make sure to ask and see what kind of hours you can get.
Medicare also has something called "intermittent care" that a member was able to get for her Aunt and Mother. Ask her doctor about it.
JoAnn-I know you meant to say as "Independent" as she can be.
Maybe there is a computer glitch going on if it does not post as we meant to type it.
Good answer.
There is still time to change it, a total of 30 minutes.
Is your wife mentally able to understand?
If yes, you need to tell her what you are feeling when she gets impatient with you.
If no, could it be time for her to go to a facility? Maybe, bringing in an aide to help her? Maybe, adult daycare?
I can't imagine the strain of working full-time and then having to come home to another full-time plus job. I think that's why we have children when we are young, because our old bodies can't deal with all of this without failing.
Have you encouraged your wife to do everything she can and to attempt things she thinks she can't do? She is at a dangerous point of losing what she isn't using and obviously, the situation isn't sustainable.
Be honest with her and yourself. Something has to give and it could easily be your own health. That wouldn't be good for either of you.