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At least my mom did apologize before she died and I do feel that it was a sincere apology. One of my brothers apologized too. The other one is indifferent. He has always been distant and has a few issues that he hasn’t dealt with.
It’s terrible that your mom treats your children the way she does. I am sure that it hurts you to see that because it’s hard on them.
What’s going on? I don’t want pry but why is mom living with you? Have you considered telling her that she can no longer live with you?
The very last thing I want to do is make you feel worse. I absolutely hated when I was devastated like you are now, if someone told me, “You chose this!” It is such a harsh and inconsiderate thing to say to someone who is hurting so badly. So, I really hope no one says that to you.
No one “chooses” to be mistreated. You’re a victim of her verbal abuse. It’s similar to a wife being abused by her husband and no one says to them, “You chose to be with an abusive husband.
I had my mom for 15 years too. I know how hard it is. My mom was good to my children and husband. I am grateful for that.
Fill us in a bit more so we can try to help you.
Wishing you peace during this stressful time.
You are an adult and it is okay to tell ANYONE that they need to stop being nasty and ugly. You can even tell her to not speak with you until she can be civil.
I know that we feel a loyalty to our narc parents, regardless of how they treat us, they trained from birth to get their ego strokes and undying loyalty from us. However, there comes a time when we must step back and implement boundaries or they will consume us in every way possible.
YOU MATTER AND DO NOT DESERVE to be treated like you don't.
Great big warm hug for all you do and what you are. She would be up a creek without you.
When will you be willing to make the necessary changes to improve your life? I don't think you really need advice, as you've gotten that over the years. You know what you have to do.
How can we encourage you to do what YOU need to do, which is to get your mother out of your house? That is really the only option to improve your situation, don't you see?