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Call Office of Aging for resources. Transportation, meals on wheels, aides. Get al your info together. Maybe even start some of it. Tell Mom its time to return to RI. She needs to take advantage of what is available. That you cannot take the abuse and its time to go.
https://www.mauicountyadrc.org
Your mother lives in a tiny city on a small island in Hawaii.
You sadly lost your father one year ago, only.
Your bereaved mother felt that she needed your support and asked you to come home to care for her.
Agreeing to do that was not a bad idea. Your mother did need your support, and you were willing to give it. But making it permanent... that's just not working.
How difficult would it be to reverse the process and return to your own life? What practical support does your mother in fact need? What are her health issues? What services and/or facilities are available for her? Is anything stopping you going home to RI and picking up where you left off?
It's only a year, and I wouldn't have thought it would be too late. But this isn't about "punishing" your mother for her unkindness, or abandoning her to her fate. It's just about recognising that you had a plan, it isn't working, so you and she need to make a different plan.
For myself, I would not want to live with a mean person but I could probably put up with some misbehavior for a limited amount of time if the person had dementia and couldn't help it. Has your mom always been kind of impossible? Could it be time to move out and try to assist her from a safe distance?
I hope you can find some good strategies for this situation!