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I would immediately buy the condom catheters if you think the doctor's office will not prescribe it for him. They should though because he is incontinent. If your dad will not pull it off then you will wake up with dry sheets at least 90% of the time and he won't get bed sores and ulcers from the damp urine piercing his skin. My dad had a hip fracture in 2014 and ever since then he lost his ability to ambulate. He was able to get the urinal through out the night and relieve himself. But in 2017 he lost use of his left arm. We would change him in the morning but he was usually soaking wet and then came bed sores. He got so depressed it affected his appetite because his bottom sores were not healing. Whomever stayed the night then had to start getting up 3-5 times to place the urinal and wait until he finished peeing. It felt as if we were doing bottle feedings with newborns. Condom catheters have been a life saver for us. After much research we came across this as an option and his doctor said matter of factly, they would be a good idea after I asked about them. Please get them for your loved one. If they are not approved you can still buy them without a prescription and just attach the urine bag to the end of the condom catheter. Find the right size. We use Coloplast with my dad and they are very sticky so they stay in place well the majority of the time. We get to sleep through the night just occasionally repositioning him.... The cost of these catheters may be less than a dollar a day and the piece of mind of sleeping through the night and not having to wash urine sheets would be more than well worth the price. Tell your doctor about his incontinence and I would think it will get covered. Good Luck!!!
My adult son has severe autism and functions at about a 2-3yr old level. I use to call him The Pee Houdini. Rainman could soak his pajamas, sheets, blanket, comforter, sometimes his pillow and yet the nighttime diaper would be bone dry! It was beyond frustrating.
My son is much better these days - KNOCKING WOOD - I’m almost afraid to write this, least I jinx it!!! I think a large part is the result of a technique called Trip Training which is frequently used with kiddos like my son - but which unfortunately, I do not think will work for you. Also my hubby leaves for work before the sun is up - so at roughly 4am he gets Rainman up and takes him to the bathroom. The other thing I do is no liquids after 6pm. Rainman accepts that usually but I agree that is harder in your situation.
Another post asks about diuretics. I’ll ask specifically about the Congestive Heart Failure prescription Lasix. My father HATED it cause it had him up peeing all night. Eventually, my father accepted a bedside urinal as stairs were involved to get to the bathroom. But eventually the lack of sleep got to him and he started playing fast and loose with his medication - taking it all at once in the morning or not taking it at all, which lead to even worse problems than having to pee all night!
Anyhoo - I realize I’ve probably not been any help - sorry. But I did want to let you know that I feel for what you’re going through and to say - eventually, this too shall pass.
Just trying to think about how to keep him dry.
I used to cry when I had to do 5 loads of laundry on top of everything else I had to do that day.
The incontinence was my deal breaker. I just couldn't deal with a 300# man that needed that level of care.
Good luck. I know how much that sucks.
Maybe getting up to use a bedside commode might work better than the urinal (which he is likely trying to use while lying in bed), combined with a good pull up brief.
If this is the problem I would check out one made for women, more room to get it right.
https://www.alzstore.com/adult-incontinence-products-s/1822.htm
https://thoroughlyreviewed.com/home-kitchen/adult-diaper-review/
https://www.llmedico.com/blog/best-overnight-adult-diapers/