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Is there another reason that you are worried this is something avoidable, such as side effects of the meds she's on? For example, has the loss of memory come on suddenly?
However, this may seem uncharacteristic to you, whereas her close family may have seen the changes happen over a period of time. People in our extended family saw my mum on good days, so some relatives were shocked when Mum started to exhibit more obvious dementia traits.
If your SiL hasn't been evaluated for dementia, then it could be something else, but please be assured that both your SiL and MiL are handling their memory loss in classic ways, just differently. There is no one way with dementia, and unpredictability is really the only certainty.
I've also had people come up to me and say they met me at such/such place and I never have been there or even close. I often wonder if I have a doppelganger.
That's life. Unless they are causing trouble, go along with it, and allow the other person to keep their pride and enjoy/make the most of, the interaction.
It depends what stage they are in - and a multitude of other factors.
I would change the question to something along the lines of 'why does this bother you" however a person inflicted 'wants' to handle their communications / changing brain.
Does this behavior trigger you?
Or are you asking how to handle it ?
A person with dementia may well ask everyone who they are.
If they are at a level of knowing they do not know, they may feel deep embarrassed and try to hide it -
The key is to support the person to stay calm however you can.
And I would encourage you to process how their behavior affects you personally.
Gena / Touch Matters
This bothers the op because she loves and cares about her SIL and it hurts and scares her to see the woman going down such a path.
Have you never had a LO "afflicted" with dementia????? We are all personally upset by witnessing their decline, btw. Just sayin.
It took my daughter by surprise at Christmas when she came home to see us. She was sad that her Grandma didn’t know her. But it’s the disease.
so yes, that is something a person with Dementia says.
Good luck
If so, then this is common. In fact dementia patients may forget even husbands and children.
I don't think it's uncommon. We are all different as people, so when are brain is dieing we are all different also.
To me it's actually kind of sweet