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When my mom became bedridden, I didn't know how to change her pamper. I was at work when she came home. I Tried to change her pamper like an infant. Hurt my back - and it didn't work. I finally learned the correct way by taking time off to watch the professionals do it. I watched and asked questions - why this, why that, why.... 13 years of changing her while bedridden.
When my dad became bedridden a few years ago, there was no one else to do it but me. I didn't know how to change or clean a male. I told my sister-in-law that I don't know how to do it. She used to do her bedridden father's pamper. So, she showed me how to do it. I will say that it took me a long time to not want to throw up while changing his pamper (due to my dysfunctional childhood). I had to turn on the TV LOUD and blank my mind as I cleaned his private areas.... As for my dad, he sooo much prefers female caregivers to wash him. I remember coming home one time, he was upset. The agency sent a *aghast* a Man! {{{chuckling}}} {{rolling eyes}}
Worked every time.
I don't think it should be a major problem if you do your best to maintain privacy. Keep them covered and have them wash the front under a towel if possible. Once they are on their side to clean the back it is not such a problem.
For real YUK try digging the smegma out from under a foreskin when the owner has neglected it himself.
All praise to you Stacy for taking on a very difficult but necessary job. I can take on most everything but vomit is my very weak point.
Sorry to those who I have freaked out.
Imagine my consternation as a rather older nurse I began working for hospice I was faced with catheterizing a male patient. Luckily the first one was unconscious and I quickly became proficient. I was very good with females and the other nurses claimed males were easier.
As far as bathing male patients no problem there. A that time male nurses were as rare as hens teeth.
As a patient in a US hospital I was at first horrified to be bathed by a male aide but like everything else I got used to it
My husband is absolutely uncomfortable with the peri- anal care of his father, who is bedbound and double incontinent. Thankfully he does have a urinary catheter in place, but still goes number 2 in his adult diaper daily (due to the proper medication we give him, and exact Science in itself!), so I'm it!
Am I happy with this scenario, No, but what alternative do I have, we signed up for this job, and he just as easily could have been sent to a Nursing home to live out his days dying of Lung cancer, which neither of us wanted.
I have told my husband that I will do this care until I am unable, and ever before I give up, we will get additional care in to help with the morning routine, but as another poster mentioned, you have to get you head straight, that your Loved one is unable to do this kind of care on their own any longer, and you have to go about it in a very clinical manner, much like changing a large baby, or else you simply cannot, and/or make alternative arrangements, probably, a Nursing home.
It's Awful, I agree, but my husband just does not have the stomach for it, and Lucky Me, so far do! It's not easy though, especially when it's not your blood relative, whom you absolutely Love! This kind of care Ain't for Dummies!
Let's get even More technical, as yesterday I pointed out to our Hospice Nurse, a small rash that I thought might be appearing, and the Nurse pointed out that I had to pull back the foreskin, Yuck, even I almost lost it, but it does become second nature, and you just have to get down to it, and do it quick! Yay!
During his 5 days of Hospice Care - my father loved the attention from the 2 nurses who came to the house to bathe him. I was there, nothing inappropriate was done. He admitted to them that he didn't want his daughter to do it unless absolutely necessary.
Had it been necessary, I would have cleaned him.