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yeah, everyone grows old...and many grow so old they outlive their bodies ability to carry on. It is hard to be trapped in a frail body when your minds image is still vital.
yes, for her own safety and protection ... you made the right decision.
Its the only rational solution but it still breaks your heart.
Find out if there is a geriatric psychiatrist who makes visits to this AL. Have your mom seen. Meds can't cure dementia, but often the right combination of antidepressants and antianxiety meds can mitigate the anger, depression and agitation that accompany it.
Elderly people fall. They fall at home, in ALs and in Nursing homes. When I told a discharge planning RN that my mom fell with 2 aides in her room, she replied "my mom fell with 3 RNs in the room and one of them was ME". She pointed out that sometimes falls are caused by spontaneous hip fractures, TIAs and low BPs; all things that are pretty common in elderly folks.
When mom falls in the AL, there are folks around to witness it and get her the help she needs. She is where she needs to be.
You can't second guess your decision. I know seeing your mom so unhappy breaks your heart but all you can do now is concentrate on trying to help your mom to adjust to her new life situation. You know in your heart that eventually even if you were to take her back to her old living situation that she would ultimately end up where she needs to be which is where she is now.
You have made the right choice.
Oh, and by the way, it's the LAW for them to complain about all sorts of things in AL. If they didn't have things to invent to complain about, they'd have nothing to talk about!! Especially The Food. OMG the food is so horrrrrrrrrrrrible. Meanwhile, my mother has gained nearly 50 lbs since 2014 from all the 'horrible' food!! Just let it all go in one ear & out the other, unless you feel she is making a VALID complaint about something. Then you speak to the ED about it, naturally.
Best of luck!
One thing that seems to help is if their family doesn't visit or call a great deal at first; keeps them from grasping so hard at the possibility of going "home". After awhile, "home" becomes the AL for most.
If I could encourage you to help her get involved in activities by going with her and starting conversations with others, help her find friends.
She may never adjust, but you are right, she needs 24/7 care and she is exactly where she needs to be.
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