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I was there when he was sick but rushed away when he was getting better. All I can do, is hang on to those memories that I have with him, they are all very nice.
I only get to see him when he is sick, not when he is doing well. At this point I will take what I can get!
I am to the point where if I want dad in my life...I have to fight for it...and fight I will. I am hurt to the core...but this is just wrong. They are hurting my dad too. Enough!
I have tried to find an attorney before, but I guess the whole out of state issue has scared them off.
Praise God!! I found a wonderful Attorney! I even checked them out with my Father in Law, who was a Judge in IN for years. He spoke VERY HIGHLY of this firm and this Attorney!
I want nothing more than to be in my fathers life, to know when he is sick and in the hospital and to be able to visit him without fearing for my life. Simple... I LOVE HIM SO!
And hey - at least they took him to the hospital when he needed it, and get him out of the house for some outings. They could be doing him a lot worse, from some of the stories I've read on here...
The Church knows nothing of the gift.., it is in OH, dad moved back after Mom passed from Lou Gehrigs in 2001. My Mother stopped going to dad's family functions because they are very mean people! All I can do is PRAY and hope things go the way they are suppose to..
As for the crying.. I found out my father was back in the hospital at 11:30 last evening.. All I have been doing is crying since then. My family did not tell me, I saw it on a friends post on FB..
that's what people thought you meant. But you have got to be feeling that way yourself.
I would put the unhealthy food thing in perspective, but the threatening and the chance of inappropriate financial management is more serious and my heart goes out to you that you cannot get help with that. Is there anyone from the church with connections that could help (they would at least have an interest, since it is their potential "gift" being squandered?) It almost sounds like your uncle, your brother, and you dad are turning the whole thing into a stag party...of course, Dad picked the uncle to be POA, at least he knew not to make it your brother, and maybe not you because he knew brother would threaten?? Maybe, maybe not, but all of us may have to live with consequences of not picking the right POA. I had just posted my own question about that even before reading this post of yours...
If you need help or to vent we are here for you....but don't take your anger towards your brother out on us.
My dad put his brother, my uncle as POA, someone who lived 15 minutes from Dad but HAD NEVER BEEN TO VISIT DAD SINCE HE HAD MOVED INTO HIS PLACE 9 YEARS AGO!
My Uncle and my brother became very close NAND when Dad was hospitalized I stayed the night with him every night, Dad liked to get out of his bed and I wanted to be there so he wouldn't hurt himself. My brother and I went to day's house to get some of his belongings because he was getting released from the hospital and going to rehab. My brother pushed me, hit me, chased me around. I called the Police..it was a joke. All of this is happening because my father is donating a very large sum of money to the church! Unfortunately, my brother who, with his family...lived with my parents, had my parents purchase a house for his family, cars..pool tables , you name it believes that he is entitled to the money that Dad wants to go to the Church!. The POA has made comment that he believes it should go to the children too. After I called the police on my brother, the POA told me I was not allowed to see my dad any more. Locked me out of dads condo, with my belongings inside.....so I left IN and went home to FL. My dad has mentioned several times that he knows my brother is trying to kill him...for money!
If I call, they hang up on me, so I decided...I just couldn't do it anymore. I would give up my relationship..and hope he would call.
I gave and gave and let them walk all over me. My brother was smoking in dads car and I mentioned that he did not need to do that around dad, My uncle said "he is already sick, it's not going to kill him". I just had to walk away...... My Uncle has listened to all the lies my brother has said and didn't even give ME a chance. That is sad! I have spent the last 17 years volunteering and helping people my brother has been in and out of jail... Grow up and get to know me for me!!
Don't take my father AWAY
Was that last one a shot at us for not answering sooner?
I'm sorry for your troubles. I have a friend who was railroaded by the cops who were buddies with her father - dragged her out of her house in a slip!
Can you get any support from friends or neighbors or other relatives who see that they are not taking proper care of him? Has he been declared incompetent? It would have to be more than just taking him out to eat junk food. Do they take him to the doctor regularly?
Unless he has been declared incompetent, there probably isn't much you can do. A lawyer would be the only one who could help you to find out if there is anything you can do. He would know whether you can get rights to visit him. I understand how distressing this must be for you, and hope things can work out.
All I can offer you House is an ear to vent too. Can I ask...when and why did you stop being the caregiver? I wish you lived on Long Island...my brother is a very prominent lawyer here, and has an elder attorney on his staff.