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It is all a bit of a challenge...I am there with you. Once I took my mom to the doctor and said I think she has a UTI. They gave me a cup and said take her to pee in it! Mom had been incontinent for over a year. I still put her on the bedside commode to change her every 2 hours but she never, ever went on it. She was wheelchair bound, couldn't stand, dead lift for me... And they think I would be able to get her to pee in a cup!
We took a toilet hat home, I spent an hour with her on the commode and finally got a sample, which I ran back to the office. They told me it was too old and wouldn't even test it...what! So frustrating. The next day I did the same thing but took it straight to the lab.
I feel for you. The candy bar works for the Seroquel...I put two in every night. When she needs antibiotics I crush and put in either chocolate pudding or vanilla Greek yogurt (something I add fruit or jam too). Tried apple sauce but she spit it at me! You just have to find something she likes.
It took a long while for her to take her meds by mouth from a couple of nurses and anyone new or whom she didn't like forget about it - as recently as a few weeks ago we laughed when she was caught hiding one under her seat cushion with a new male nurse
Now that she's declined so much from a hospital stay, she can barely swallow liquids without choking so I think they're using pudding again
Antibiotics 3x a day for 10 days was no picnic
Because of the Dementia, she was combative at times, and sometimes she would get suspicious regarding the medications / supplements. We were able to wean her off the two prescriptions she was on with the help of her physician. We then provided her with supplements and she was much better off because of it! In that she was a sundowner, the late afternoon 3pmish hour was the worst for her. To counteract that we were proactive with making sure we had snacks planned prior to when she would start sundowning. That helped her during the trying times of the day, and helped us cope too!
We found it was easiest to put her supplements into her applesauce, which she had every morning and loved. In the afternoons we mixed it in with her chocolate protein shake about a half hour before the hour that was the most difficult for her. Then for her bedtime supplements we used applesauce again.
The applesauce with her supplements tasted terrible to us, but due to the nerve damage of the senses, we figured she must not have tasted any bitterness. It worked very well!
The applesauce and chocolate protein shakes were the answer in order to get her to take her supplements, and even though it might taste terrible to you, your elderly loved one / patient may not even notice.
You can ask for an involuntary psychiatric hold for 72 hours in most states.
If she won't take meds, she is probably beyond the point of being able to be cared for at home.