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Since they are recommending a feeding tube I am assuming it is going to do a number on her throat and mouth making it too painful for her to eat?
What has the doctor said about the pain the radiation will cause from just the simple act of swallowing your own saliva which we all do involuntarily who knows how many times a day.
My dad had throat cancer but it was caught early enough that he did not have to have very many treatments and he was still able to eat without any pain or discomfort. He was lucky. There are many who are so damaged by their radiation treatments that they are in constant pain trying to eat normally afterwards.
Hopefully mom is prepared for all bad outcomes before deciding whether to proceed or not. What is life expectancy with treatment and without.
Does your mother want a feeding tube? I would ensure that you are all prepared for her to have a feeding tube as that is the more likely outcome. If she has health directives or you can discuss the situation with her, I would.
My Mom did not have a feeding tube. (Mom was in her mid 40's)
My Mom had cancer of the throat and larynx.
My Grandma had a tube that my Dad would give her nutrition through, it was a tube that went through her nose. (trying to recall all this now, it is difficult to remember I was so young) She eventually did get off the tube feeding. (she was in her late 80's I think)
My Grandma (maternal Grandma by the way) had cancer of the jaw and 1/2 of the jaw was removed and no reconstruction was done this time (a previous surgery that had removed a portion of the jaw was rebuilt using rib)
I guess the big question is how does your mom feel about this?
She is the one that the doctor should be addressing this to. She is the one that should be making this choice.
After all it is she that will be going through this.
And I guess the other question is if she wants the feeding tube does she want it temporarily or would she be alright if it is permanent?
I hope she is also aware that opting out of the surgery is also a valid option. Quality of life is more important than quantity. And if this is a decision she makes that the family honors it.
And a side note here...If mom is competent she should be making this decision, if she is not competent I would NOT opt for surgery of any kind.
And the bigger question is, if she would want it only as a temporary measure are you alright with that decision.
This MD in this case is I think being honest. Is essentially saying "Are you certain you want to go through all of this".
I will say that without the feeding tube, his passing may have been sooner since he was getting absolutely no nutrition and very little hydration.
My point being that your mom will not be able to take in any nutrition without one.
If she is choosing to have radiation, I don't think she has much choice about a feeding tube, meaning one of the biggest pleasures in life will also be taken away from her: eating food. This is a very serious undertaking for a woman her age, really.
Wishing you and your mom the very best of luck
I know that you didn't pull that out of thin air, so I am assuming that the physician has told you this.
If the MD told you this you should know it is the most likely thing to happen.
Also understand that radiation therapy, especially in the elderly, causes burns and scarring in delicate tissues that can obstruct.
Is anyone leveling with you here, and with your Mom, about the alternative choices that may be made for palliative or hospice care? Have you clearly been told the chances of this not only not being curative but in fact causing further complications and pain?
If you are fully informed, and if you are fully aware, of all possible/probable outcomes including loss of speech and swallow being possible, and Mom wishes still to make this fight, then that is her choice. But, yes, believe your doctors.
Now if some neighbor from across the fence is telling you this information, disregard it.
You are in the hands I hope of competent doctors who are being VERY HONEST with you all. I am so sorry about this dire situation. I hope for the best for your Mom.
I'm not sure she really has a choice in this matter if she's wanting to proceed with the radiation, do you?
And as far as the feeding tube being removed or not, you can cross that bridge if and when the time comes.
My husband had a feeding tube surgically put in after he had a massive stroke and he wasn't able to swallow. After a short time his ability to swallow returned and his feeding tube was removed.
I think everyone's situation is different and you would like to think that your mother's doctors will do what is best for her.
Praying that everything goes well with her treatments.