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My mom also would not eat. We tried everything. We asked her what she would eat. We came up with things she enjoyed in the past. We came up with things we wouldn't eat, but thought she'd enjoy (she loved hot dogs and sauerkraut). She would eat a few bites and loved to have someone eat with her. I would joke with her that she was eating like a super model and I was trying to lose weight.
My mom passed away a few weeks ago. She had gone from a size 12 to a size 4 over the past year and a half. What I'm happy about is that I took her to Banana Republic and bought her size 4 corduroy jeans (she loved fancy jeans and was quiet a dresser).
Your dad seems to have very serious medical issues, but I'm just saying since we are not physicians, all we can do is to be good kids and family members. Bring him things that will make him happy in the moment. Hug him, tell him you love him and try to help him find joy. I know that seems hugely difficult but I'm happy that I tried everything that my husband and I could think of in the last few years... Wishing you all the best.
Also, others on this site suggested that I contact hospice. I did not actually get to do that before my mom passed away, but it is my understanding that they can be very helpful in just initial conversations. They can give you good suggestions and share a lot of information with you.
Again, all the best to you. I hope this was a little bit helpful...
This is well said. My father wasn't hungry in the last 3 weeks, if he said he wanted pizza, I brought it. He would take one bite and that was it, it's ok he just needed a taste. I scanned photos and put them on a DVD and we watched them and he shared them with others. We warmed blankets to put on him because he was cold.
We had the help of a pallitave care team (or Hospice) in the last week. They helped with the symptoms as he continued on his journey. They also counsel and comfort the family.
Sending hugs to you!
It sounds like your dad is beyond taking commands or doing anything for himself. If you are bringing him home, he will need total care and hospice may be a good idea. At a certain point the disease takes over completely and the body no longer responds to nourishment etc.
I suggest you speak to his doctors and see what they have to say. If this is the case and you want to bring him home, contact hospice and have them do an assessment before you bring him home. Good luck!
I strongly urge you to bring in Hospice, whether you bring him home or he stays in the nursing home. They can help you understand the dying process and what he is going through.
We decided to increase his protein (since it's very low 2.5 & he has ESRD & Vascular Dementia) and I bought 'Unjury Unflavored Protein' which you can put in practically anything and there is no after taste. His appetite improved and he's drinking more fluids. It's a slow process and I'm not in denial about how serious his medical conditions are, but as someone already mentioned we just have to be good kids and take care of our parents. If he wants to drink protein shakes 2 out of 3 meals a day, so be it! :) With in reason (and as long as the doctor is okay with it), let them eat what they want.
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