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For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted; a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; ...
It gives me comfort, that He knows and understands what He has given us and the blessings and burdens life entails. It is NOT easy the days and decisions we have to endure. Each situation and individual is different. I had my mom placed in an AL and a lot of people on here would say I'm not honoring God by doing that. "Your parents took care of you when you were young and that's your place now."
Not to the detriment of my marriage and my child. I truly believe on does not risk those dear relationships and their own health and sanity for the sake of an unreasonable and demanding parent.
I visit my mom every other day, bring her meals, do her bills and taxes, laundry, every other thing under the sun. I am honoring her and even though she is in an AL, I am still exhausted.
My son is now driving, in high school and has a job. He is looking forward to life and college.
Mom is losing her memory, has many health problems and I cared for my dad while he died of brain cancer.
There is no comparison, except for the fact that we are all at a 'season' in our lives. Hopefully all of us we'll get to see Spring, Summer, Winter and Fall. And there will be joy and love in each of them.
How thrilling it is when baby first says "ma-ma" or "da-da" and applies those terms to the correct people! How heartbreaking it is when Dad no longer knows who you are.
With a child you look forward to the start of school, and graduations, and proms, and engagements, and weddings, and maybe grandchildren. With a parent you dread the next fall, the further dementia decline, the fading memories, hospitalizations, rehab, and finally death.
Elders may do childish things but they are not children. They have a lifetime of experiences and you cannot treat them as children. And if they have dementia they do not learn from their experiences or your teaching.
Don't get me wrong -- there are many satisfactions to caregiving, just as my friend who is a hospice nurse finds great satisfaction in that role. But anyone who thinks that caregiving an elder is just like raising a child except for size either has never done both or is at least slightly delusional.