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You know shes sitting here watching most haunted then will sh..herself here one night when Im not here? I dont get it "if you try and reason with madness you get violence"
Also a new band im listening to "kodaline" irish, listen to their new song and weep into your pillow I love this song but its soooo our lives and very sad but true song title is "life passes you by" so apt i listened to this the other night feeling so down then realised I have to get my life back on track and pretty damn quick! Doc says i need a holiday i said no doc I need peace a wk away aint going to cut it I need to be me again!
Oh silly you JB didnt you check the plugs first before you changed bulbs!!!! LOL
everyday i have to learn to "let go" if she falls she falls. I cant keep having a panic eveytime she does something "MAD"
Today I went for a walk to clear my head the clutter is just so stressful and the worst thing is im up early and clean the whole house then late afternoon when all you want is some peace SHES OFF rummaging,half cleaning,putting products around stuff and leaving them there. House smells of urine am I a happy caregiver YIKES!!!!!!!!! There must be a drug that WE can take to make us laugh everytime they infuriate us a couldnt give a toss drug something to calm the nerves. Its all about them WE need drugs we could call it the "coping drug" a pill you just pop and everything they do makes you laugh AND gives you super energy.
Better go now have cooking and cleaning to do AND to RUB salt on my wounds this guy down the road ive fancied for years and havnt seen in about 6mths has gotten himself married and shes pregnant! How do you do that in 6mths he was single last time we met where the hell is MY LIFE! So fed up. As you can imagine my face...." IM SOOOOOOOOO HAPPY FOR YOU" i actually cried on the way home not just because I fancied him but what the hell have I done in 6mths ran around looking after MUM! really made me realise that my life needs to change and soon.
My mother went through a time when she was rummaging drawers and closets. It was nerve-wracking and messy. Fortunately, the phase passed quickly. Sometimes I asked what she was looking for, and sometimes she would answer and I would try to direct her some. Sometimes it worked and other times it didn't. I usually ended up coming behind her and straightening the mess that was made. When I straightened, I worked with her on it, so it didn't upset her more.
Going back to hanging onto the edge of the hole -- today I realized that I was having strong feelings and reactions that were not like me. I realized that I was afraid that something would loosen the dirt of my grasp and I would fall into the hole of total incompetence. It helped me to realize that I wasn't going crazy. I am just trying to hold things together without anyone extending a hand to help. The only people in our lives really don't care enough to get involved in a meaningful way. The professionals take the money and say good luck. The family says things look fine to them -- an easy out to not getting involved.
The only advice I have is see if there is a medication that helps, call in any backup troops you have available, and cleanup behind her, letting her participate in your reorganization. Most of all, realize that when you're feeling crazy that you're not. You are just having to be too competent to hold things together. Dementia is such a cruel thing.