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Be a grown up and find your own place to live. You live in HER house and then you removed her from her house and left her
on a doorstep. I’m glad you aren’t my kid .
Sounds like your brother was burned out with caregiving and resentful that you were being a freeloader living in Mom’s house while your brother was the one helping Mom.
And your only concern with this is if you can be arrested . SMH
How long has your brother been taking care of your Mom? Maybe he's burned out? This is a pretty common problem for caregivers.
How old is your Mom? What are her physical and cognitive issues that she needs 24/7 care?
Has anyone considered talking to a social worker for her county to see what other options may be available for her?
Does she have an assigned PoA? Or legal guardian? Who is managing her finances all this time? Caregiving is mostly about problem-solving. You both need to work together to solve your Mom's ongoing care needs. Or is it about inheriting the house?
I feel sorry for your Mom... if she has dementia or short-term memory loss I would not just drop her off without making sure someone was home to receive her inside.
I think you and your brother should sell the house, put mom in a facility.
Some place where she is taken care of . I would do it ASAP, before authorities get involved, so it looks like someone is caring for your poor mom.
Yes I'm sure it's a lot taking care of mom for both of you, but this is wrong to do to her.
This is no way to treat a fellow human being, regardless of their relation to you.
You and your brother need to seriously grow up.
I surely hope for both of your sakes, neither of you have children that are being shown that this is an acceptable way to handle caregiving problems. Dumping off an elderly person like a bag of garbage at someone's front door. That's despicable.
And I truly hope this is a fake post.
When you need a break, you arrange for responsible caregiving. You don't pull a "dump and run" on someone's front porch!
If this poster had done this to a dog, people would be screaming "off with his head!".
Not sure dropping your mom off at each other's house can get you arrested.
Agree with cwillie. What's your mom saying all this time? doesn't she voice her opinions? Is she going along with both of you.
I know I wouldn't want a sons like the both of you, does either of you actually care about her really, or just a battle of egos.
I've been and still am going through this sibling rivalry. So know about responsibility, in my case I care about my mom enough to help, but still think the rest of siblings haven't done their part over the years. They are living out their lives for the last 20+ years as normal, while mine has been on hold. So usually there's one sibling that cares enough to help. In your case it sounds like neither of you want to help with your mom, so as cwillie said a mediator is needed.
Welcome to the AC forum. Please stick around and look through the list of resources that can help you. Get in contact with the Department of Aging and explain the situation. You must earn an income to keep yourself afloat if you are not retirement age. Tell them that you cannot take care of mom and that you must work to pay the bills! Can you move out and call APS and report a vulnerable adult?
I don't know the arrangements you made with your brother, but it doesn't seem to be working at this point. Your mother's safety is at risk when both of you pull this dumping act. This is abandonment and yes you can be held responsible leaving your mother on someone's doorstep not knowing they are home or not.
What did your mother ever do to you to treat her this way. If she has dementia, how would you feel if she wandered off somewhere and got hot by a car? What would either of your excuses be? You brother will probably lie on you to save his own a$$.
Don't encourage this person who basically abandoned their own mother then took over her house.