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Excuse my poor manners. My sympathies and prayers to you and your mom in this tough time.
As a previous hospice nurse, relieving your mom's anxiety and pain is what hospice is all about. I don't think you'll have any difficulty getting the nurse to change the medication if it isn't working. The hospice docs just want the patient calm and at ease so usually will go along with the family's wishes.
The main goal is to keep her physically and mentally comfortable. The agitation makes the caregiving many times tougher. Plus we hate to see our loved ones so riled up. Please feel free to openly discuss anything with her nurse. I'm sure she'll do her best for your mom and you.
Some hospices have music therapists which might calm her. A music therapist comes to the house with a guitar or other instrument and they sing all the good old songs.
There are chaplain services and social workers to help YOU out in this rough time too. Let other people help you.
I hope you are taking advantage of the bath aide? Is there a massage therapist available from hospice?
Would your mom calm down if she had a stuffed animal or doll to hold? Sometimes that works. As overwhelmed as you might be with her behavior, in some cases, patients calm down with light stroking of the arms or face/hair. Lotion is easily applied that way. Unfortunately with others, the stroking is more of an irritation. (It is to my mom who was not a physically demonstrative person.)
May God help you through this very tough time.
Don't forget, it takes awhile to get a "blood level" of the drug in their system. Give it at least 3 days to see if the increase of Ativan works. Her body is already used to the smaller dose and you know she doesn't have any side effects from it. I'm sure that's why the nurse wants to increase it instead of change it to something else.
-1 MG in the evening and 1MG at bed time and .5 mg in the morning. I dont know if I can stomach this trial and error business. If it "doesnt work" tonight she will talk to the Dr and see what else they can try.
Wish me luck!
I'm an only too. After awhile the Ativan wasn't cutting it anymore (mom took it for years before the dementia showed up) then during the dementia until she got anxious, frustrated and mean.
We tried Seroquel and something else but Xanax (generic name Alprazolam) has worked the best. She's calm but alert. It is an anti anxiety medicine of the catagory benzodiazepines.
Dear Heavens, it's such a hard road having to try one medication then another until you find something that works.
I dont much like Haldol for the demented elderly, just from my nursing experiences.
Good luck. Hope this helps.
She is on Seroquel and that has been helping her sleep, but maybe she needs Xanax added. Thanks for the suggestions!