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My SILs father and Mother did this and her Mom was able to still do her volunteering and playing bridge. If you can afford it, I think its a great option. But...do it sooner rather than later so DH will except the AL as home. You may want to return to the east coast where ur closer to friends and family. You may need the support from these people and someone to have lunch with.
I wasn't sure my friend's experience is just not a special situation as she is in the Deep South. I doubt if the Idaho Panhandle will provide such a place as they are very slow to even have townhouses or condos for retirees, not to mention anything much for special needs.
Always appreciate your help and advice to everyone!
What makes you feel that you, yourself, are ready for ALF?
Is there somewhat unlimited funds, because you won't get two for the price of one. While there may be some lessening of the spousal fee, it won't be a whole lot I think.
Can you tell us more about your age, your husband's needs and requirements, and your own?