By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or
[email protected] to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our
Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our
Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
~Costs are a known quantity BEFOREHAND, and something your mother should be paying for.
~Walking a dog in AL by the staff is something that generally costs more; get that in writing before the lease is signed. "Periodic" walking of the dog is way too vague & suggestive of double talk.
~Twice weekly showers is the norm; that should also be in the lease and not something that's open for debate.
~If your mother is having THAT many issues with her phone & TV remote, it is suggestive of dementia. At 89, has she been tested with a cognitive exam by her doctor? Know what you're dealing with at all times in terms of mom's health, both mental & physical. It's not the ALs fault that mom can't work her phone & remote.
~Everyone 'hates the food' in AL, it's the law. If the elders have nothing to complain about, they have nothing to TALK about together at all. I know from where I speak; my folks were in AL for 7 years. They'll have good meals and bad meals, but always always dwell on the bad ones. Meanwhile, very few elders lose weight while living in AL. You do the math on that one.
~Stump the pavement & find a facility that has good reviews online; preferably one that's NOT corporate owned (if possible). Speak to the residents about how THEY like living there, and how long they have. Indicative of quality of life.
~AL provides autonomy for the elder and the possibility of a longer life. I have NO doubt my mother lived to 95 precisely b/c of the quality of care she received in AL and then in Memory Care AL.
~Find an Al that adheres to the policy that the social director comes to the resident's apartment to get them to come and join in on the activities every day; that was the policy at mom's AL. They discouraged hiding out alone in one's room.
~Don't force mom to move in with you b/c YOU think it's the better idea; allow mom to make her own decision. Get her a very simple remote for the TV and a very simple phone, too. If dementia is at play, find out so you'll know; with dementia comes the inability to work any and all mechanical devices at a certain point. In the meantime, write down instructions on a large index card for mom to refer to, which is what we did for mom with her DVD player; that worked well for a number of years before her dementia got bad. Same thing with retrieving voice mails and how to use the remote control. Having her push the button/pull the cord for HELP at the AL is another option when she has trouble with her devices.
~You being there 3-5 days a week defeats the purpose of her being in AL to begin with. She has to learn to adjust w/o your continuous help, and you have to accept that things won't be perfect no matter WHERE she resides outside of your home (which won't be perfect either).
~Let the new AL know that you expect the services that are included with the rent to BE PROVIDED to your mom. My mom's AL had a schedule on the back of her door showing her shower dates and times, and laundry day as well. That's the least you should expect, along with care conferences on a regular basis.
Wishing you the best of luck getting mom set up in a new place as she would like to have happen.
Hopefully you will be able to convince your mom that it is.
I take my 94 year old mom to a senior center twice per week and she loves it.
She will be safer and healthier with you.
If she only has a problem running tech devices, why does she need help with showering, walking her dog, etc?
You need to be honest with yourself about what her condition really is.
What she wants and what she can pay for should get the most consideration, not you or your husbands desires.
Maybe she likes having other seniors to hang out with, have you considered how that need will be fulfilled if you force her back to your house?
I’m so relieved and happy!
thank you all for the suggestions and support
See All Answers