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Best Ideas I have for getting her to wear incontinence products?
-Be positive and talk them up. Act like its a great invention that really helps and is discreet and comfortable. Avoid calling them diapers or pointing out her problem too much.
-Try the pad style that will stick right into her underwear. Perhaps prepare her underwear with one ahead of time. Then she still wears her own underwear but has protection.
-Try the underwear-looking pull-up style. Most of those are thin and comfortable and flexible and easily tear off at the seams. You can even place these inside regular underwear to make them seem more discreet and less "diaper-like."
-Suggest simply "trying them out" rather than making her feel she must commit to wearing a diaper for the rest of her life
-Place some in her drawers or bathroom so that she can see them and she may try them out on her own?
-Be on her team in joining in a solution to help her and avoid coming off as telling her what to do
My grandma is pretty good about this, but those are some of the things we've had to do occasionally. It's pretty rare that she doesn't wear anything as she was wearing incontinence underwear for a few years before dementia really set in. Occasionally she will believe shes in her 20s or 30s and go looking for regular underwear, but we make these incontinence underwear very visible and she will reach for them herself most of the time.
Another thing we had made sure that there is grab bars and supports to hold on to so that my grandma can use one hand to hold and the other to pull up one side and then switch until the pants are all the way up. Honestly, it still means being at least on standby assist to help out when necessary. She is in a facility, yes? Perhaps the staff there needs to be aware that she may need some assistance getting her pants up after using the restroom.
God bless.
Also, one thing the aides at rehab and the visiting nurse both told me was to NOT call them “diapers” or “Pampers”. I was told to call them that to the wearer’s face is insulting and demeaning. Even in the throes of Dementia, a person is able to associate “diapers” with “They’re treating me like a little baby!” I always say “underwear” to hubby even though he doesn’t have dementia.
If she is in a facility that only offers minimal help with bathing, meals and medication management it is probably time to seek out a place that offers closer supervision, if her current facility says they can still handle her needs then ask them how they plan to do that, for example toileting her on a schedule might help.
Thank you again.
Thank you again.
If your mom is in a facility shouldn't they be helping her in the bathroom? I agree that trying to walk with her pants not pulled up all the way is a huge fall risk. Plus, she should have her pants up anyway. I wouldn't want my mom walking around like that fall risk or not.
With her dementia, your mom probably isn't able to learn a new routine but if you think she can I have a suggestion: we all have our habits when we go to the bathroom and most of us pull our pants down to at least the knee if not lower. If you can get your mom to pull her pants down to just below the toilet bowl (low enough so she won't urinate on her clothes) she won't have as difficult a time getting them back up again.
Enlist the help of the staff. That's what they're there for.
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