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It's not all about meeting our need to connect with the loved one, as much as meeting our loved ones needs and comfort level. Sometimes they need familiarity, as anything else can be traumatic, especially when dealing with Alzheimer's. Even familiar routines can put them into a tailspin, for no apparent reason, at times. What a debilitating disease. I believe we must put their best interests ahead of our desires, and I like to err on the side of caution.
It's rare a family member is willing to relieve you, so I say go for it. Perhaps the change of scenery may be positive.
You seem to be doing a super job w/your mother in-law! It is a 24/7 situation and I think it is great that you question her safety because many would just jump at the chance for relief. How is your relationship w/the brother? Do you feel that it is a genuine offer for him to want to have the time w/her and to lend a hand to you and your husband? The flip - side to this would be if you feel he has "other intentions" to do with money, a "Will", "Power of Attorney" , or to get ahold of her meds. because of an addiction. I only bring this to your attention because I had to experience these things firsthand because of being my mom's caregiver and things that were happening from someone that I just couldn't have even imagined. It is really sad and devastating to realize that there are so many things to think about. I hope that you and hubby are able to have others pitch in and help you. Maybe, his brother could come to your home and let you and your husband just get out of the home together - You really need to take time for each other and yourselves and not to feel guilty - I know secretsister and others will also agree. I pray everything goes well and will keep your situation in our prayers!