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My sig other's son and his wife love cats, so they would take care of our cat if something should ever happen to us. And they know how to handle the crazyness of a white/ginger male cat, since they have two themselves.
Sig and I are in our early 70's, so we tried to plan ahead. We always had 2 to 4 cats, so there was cat companionship for the cats. When we were down to one cat who was 17 at the time, we adopted a beautiful 12 year old cat from the no-kill county shelter. That added another 2 years to that 17 years old life, he just loved her :)
But once he passed, the now 14 year old cat needed a companion cat. We were back and forth to the same shelter, unfortunately the older senior cats available were to go to a home where the cat would be the only "child".
We eventually got an 8 year old white/ginger cat. He's a handful, funny as all heck, even when he is sleeping, we are always laughing. At 8 years he might outlive us if he doesn't do himself in with his stunts, but if anything should happen to sig and myself, that spoiled brat will go to a good home :) Oh, the 14 year old cat, the jury is still out if she likes him or not.
A note, our county animal shelter charges no adoption fee if a senior citizen adopts a cat who is 9 years old or older.
An ageing-care poster recently referred to the ‘sacred friendship’ with a pet, which surely is verging on blasphemy. There are huge differences in opinions on this, with Obligation and Guilt about pets almost as strong as caring for parents. It's interesting that there have been no FOG comments so far in this discussion.
We had an elderly relative who had a dog he adored. He had cancer and stopped his treatments, and knew that he wouldn't last long. He told his kids that when he died, he wanted beloved dog to be buried with him (his wife had died the year before).
Problem was, dog outlived him! Relative died and his son was supposed to put the dog down so he could be buried --- the son looked at dog and said "Man, you didn't do anything wrong, I can't just shoot you" and ended up taking the dog home to live out his days with him lol!
I still chuckle over this, and it's been 7 or 8 years ago ; )
People are doing plenty already to have their elder move in with them. I don't understand the sentiment that the pets "mean so much to Mother," so the additional burden of should be taken on. Why should it be all about what Mother wants?