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This certainly is a sad situation and it will most likely be difficult for her to understand she has to move to another location. But, if you start now looking into nursing homes, etc. you can hopefully find one that has room for her or put her name on a waiting list.
And since she won't take her meds; becomes even more difficult as she could benefit from an anti-anxiety medication or whatever a doctor would prescribe.
My heart goes out to you as this is a big responsibility and so difficult with the advancing dementia. Blessings and hope things work out.
It sounds like your aunt would qualify for a nursing home. Look for one that will accept Medicaid so that when she gets close to spending down the $45,000, you can help get her qualified for Medicaid. At her age, she may not outlive the money, but as you know, AL and nursing homes are expensive.
She really needs more care than she can get in AL. You may need a doctor's help to get her into a nursing home, so somehow you'll have to convey (by letter and a phone call?) to her doctor what is going on. You may also want to get some advice from the long-term care ombudsman in your area. The contact information can be found on your state website or at www.ltcombudsman.org. Good luck. This will be tough but you will feel more peaceful once you've accomplished the move.
Carol