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I learned the hard way……some of them are manipulative, greedy, controlling & spiteful!
(by the way, whatever age you are, you’re young).
you’re only young once. protect it. be kind to your elderly LOs, but be kind to yourself by living your best youth.
Have boundaries of steel.
Repeat after me: Have boundaries of steel.
Also, too often (way more often than you would have guessed), the healthcare system will fail your loved one for various reasons. It's up to you to do research, trust your gut, and gain the confidence to question and even challenge nurses, doctors, aides, assisting living administrative staff, etc., when appropriate. It is sometimes scary and sometimes people will not be kind to you. That being said, look for the angels--there will be a few (just a few), and they'll be your lifelines.
Also move to that other country in your twenties and don’t stay because you ‘should’ !
Isn't hindsight a wonderful thing?
That's what I'd do differently and it would have resulted in me not becoming my mother's caregiver.
- Advise options.
- Leave silence & time for decision making.
- Let consequences happen.
Repeat as required.