By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or
[email protected] to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our
Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our
Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
I was not going to say anything about the comment about not making a comment about my sister about giving it to her but those comments are from her being careless. I was not going to state my reason for making comments in that manner but she has proved she wants to continue to risk the family’s lives after what happened. She continues to be careless and shows lack of care about infecting more people and family members. She shared a cigarette with someone who had Covid and she has been careless. The day my grandma went to the hospital my sister left her alone for hours and called my mom saying she didn’t feel well. My grandma said my sister was coughing around her and not covering her mouth and felt like she coughed on her on purpose. You know we cannot make those accusations because it’s so serious to confront her so in addition to her having covid I only text with her to keep from showing my anger on her even after what my sisters tried to pull on me this morning. My other sister always have defended this sister and never thought she could do no wrong and always made me feel like an jerk about anything to do with her even if she was hitting me and I was bleeding.
I have a business trip this weekend and was going to cancel for the weekend trip for the funeral but the funeral is next week. I was going to cancel to help out with anything but my family especially my sisters told me not to cancel and pushed me to go to get my mind off of things. my sister who has covid decided that she wanted to have her daughters birthday party this weekend because she feels better even though she doesn’t have a negative test yet and feels a negative test would just suffice. People feel like a couple days after being negative is safer. My other sister is guilting me all of a sudden about going on the trip saying we knew the date, I am being selfish about not canceling the trip and I should have known. I am mad she doesn’t see the selfishness in my sisters actions for risking people’s lives and guilting people for not going when they are grieving and are still afraid of being near her after grandma’s death and that these are people who are at risk. Also I didn’t know the date but I made the date of the trip clear to everyone before my grandma got sick and they never mentioned the party date. I even asked before grandma being sick about the party date and they were like I don’t know. My family even knew about the trip because they asked mention the trip and grandma’s funeral and I told them not to worry about the trip several times and I will cancel for the funeral and no mention of the party date during several of these conversations. The party is too dangerous and upsetting and the girls will have more fun next weekend when people would feel more safe being in the same room as my sister.
Grandma is no longer suffering and that is a good thing. Try to remember that when this feels overwhelming.
Can I ask one thing? Maybe stop referring to the sister who 'gave Grandma covid' as such. It's VERY likely that sister did not know she HAD covid and wouldn't have gone around grandma if she had.
Chasing the 'who gave what to whom' can drive you NUTS! Last year with covid scares and such going on constantly--we really truly never KNEW who ground zero was. And the guilt that can come from being 'ground zero' just makes it worse.
I know that when my Gma was actively dying in a NH, some of the staff were trying to get her up and walking, some were more concerned about her overall state of being & not concerned about anything but keeping her comfortable. I remember her talking about one PT who was intent on getting her out of bed. She said "I told this guy I can't feel my hands or feet. What does he think I'm going to STAND ON!"
I wish you peace in the coming weeks.
The Walgreens near me have appointments on the weekends for COVID testing.
There was no charge, each time I was tested.
I think what is making this harder is the roller coaster and confusion. One conversation they are talking about her recovery and being positive and saying they are Putting her through physical therapy through bed. Then, the next conversation they are talking about making her passing comfortable and continuing to give her morphine. I might be overreacting but I felt they are forcing her passing and not giving her a chance because she is old. I hear of people of being in the hospital for a month and getting out of it. She has been in it for over a week.
to the concern of me catching it. I saw her last before she caught covid from my sister. I have been staying home and doing my meetings zoom and online school just in case. I am going to get the test Monday to be sure. My sister is the main caregiver now. My mom watches her two days a week to give my sister off. That Friday I helped my mom take her to her appointment. My grandma got her flu shot. I had to leave for a zoom appointment after the appointment but I came back and bought her some chocolate covered almonds that she loved. I am so glad I came back. My sister wasn’t there she was at home with the visitors who gave her covid. I did not go back after that. My sister came back Saturday and she gave my grandma covid. She didn’t know she had it until Wednesday. My grandma felt week and called my mom and they convinced her to call 911. Her biggest fear was getting covid and dying the hospital of COVID. Her stay in the hospital is her recovering then she has her really bad days. They just want to give up and I am not ready and my grandma is fighting. I want one more holiday season with her.
As to not seeing a reply button this apparently has been deemed not so much a question as a discussion, and the admins may have moved your post now to discussions, where replies are given my posting, as I am, to you.
I am wishing you peace, and hoping your grandmother is comfortable and will recover. As to your own condition, it is now very easy to get tested. If you have any suspicions that you are positive at all you shouldn't be visiting her while she is in any care setting and should be in the required isolation. Wishing you the very best.
Arp, who is her medical advocate? That is who needs to make sure that grandma's wishes are being honored.
I had to raise hell when my dad was in the hospital and they just gave him up for dead. Nope, he is still breathing and he needs to be treated like he is going to recover. I believe that's we are called home and go when it is our time but, it doesn't have to be helped along and cause pain. My dad lived another 4 years after the hospitalist gave him up for dead.
Advocate, advocate, advocate is what someone has to do. If it's grandma's time, she will go but, if it's not she needs the support to fight.
edit: I don’t see a reply button like there used to be
When you say "EOL treatment" do you mean hospice?
I can't believe that some ignorant hospital employee would say she's old. Wow, they are observant aren't they? Doesn't mean she doesn't deserve to have her EOL wishes honored.
Has anyone suggested hospice for her? May you gain great peace in your heart through this very difficult trial.
Anyway, I would first recommend getting tested for Covid-19, so you know whether you should be isolating or not - regardless, if you're sick, it's a good idea to isolate and avoid the hospital.
Are you grandmother's doctors and nurses able to share information with you over the phone? And perhaps they can set up an ipad for her to communicate with you and other family members, if she's able to do so? I know it's hard these days as people try to navigate the changing information about a brand new virus - and it's bound to result in some blame and guilt. I can only advise to be compassionate with yourself and others. Try to be positive and loving - communicate with your grandmother, and accept whatever the outcome may be, as hard as that could be.
Wishing you peace during this difficult time.
Are you feeling anger/guilt over your relationship with sister or with grandma? I can't tell. But you can mend the rift with sister, and you should try. If it's with grandma--can you get word to her that you are thinking of her and that you love her?
CG is so HARD! We do our best and then still 'fail' in some regards. Not much to do but hang in there and try to do better in the future.