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Eventually I went with another herbalist I met over a decade ago at an autumn fair. I had bought some mint lotion from her and just loved it; the fragrance was so relaxing, and it was better for dry skin post gardening than anything else I'd ever used.
So I purchased some facial cream from her, scented with frankincense and myrrh. Some years ago I bought a body lotion scented with amber lotion and patchouli. The fragrance was heavenly - literally indescribable with a soothing scent. I began taking it with me and sniffing it when I took Dad to the ER.
The new facial lotion has the same effect. Since applying it before bedtime, I've found that I fall asleep quicker; sleep better and am more rested in the morning. If I wake up too early, I put a little bit of lotion and dreamily fall back to sleep.
I've used fragrance for years as a relaxant. And I will continue to do so. I don't criticize anyone who uses meds, but try some fragrance when you're anxious and see how it works for you.
These aren't the almost abrasive, harsh scents of perfume; they're natural scents. Start with just a little sniff of cinnamon (there are some abusers of this - I've read kids are snorting it or doing something stupid with it). .... this is more like a pumpkin pie fragrance. And who doesn't love the smell of pumpkin pie?
My primary doctor started me off with the lowest mg possible and had me cut that in half. I tried that dosage for a couple of weeks. I am pill sensitive so I would know if something was amiss. And I had to make sure it wasn't mind over matter. If a pill didn't work, then onto pill #2, then onto pill #3 that was a winner.
The low dosage pills did help. Prior I use to worry myself crazy any time it rained and was worrying that my parents empty house [on the market For Sale] the basement would get water. I use to run down to the house numerous times checking. After being put on the pills, when it rained I had that so-what feeling, if the floor is wet I will deal with it then.
Hadnuff, if you aren't taking any pills to take the edge off, please look into it. And start on a very low dosage.
For those aspects of caregiving that you can't or don't want to handle, find ways to hire someone to do them for you. In other words, learn to delegate.
Caregiving is also care managing. There's no shame in admitting that there are aspects which you can't handle. That's human. We all face that same evaluative task.
It'll be more to your credit that you recognize strengths and weaknesses and create a balance than to continue to feel overwhelmed and frustrated that you can't manage everything.
We have to remember we were all thrown into a job [caregiving] which probably not many of us here would have considered that as a career option, going out and caregiving for other people.
Yet, society wants us to immediately become Mary Poppins, Hazel, June Cleaver, Dr Quinn Medicine Woman, Wonder Woman, Super Nanny, Dr. Joyce Brothers, and Martha Stewart all rolled into one person :P
Example, I am a person who like quiet time here in my home office. Unless the house is on fire, don't bother me. Caregiving my parents had caused my quiet time to change into frantic worrisome time with very little sleep. I know it wasn't my parents fault that they had aged into their 90's but there were times that threw me down the rabbit hole because they didn't plan that part of their life better. I know it is different with a spouse, but I can't imagine how I would be with my sig other.
And YES! I understand abt doctors never being around when you need them. My previous GP used to go up north to treat Indigenous people, and while I know they need help desperately, he was never here. So I got myself a new GP and we'll see how that works out.
I just want LIFE to let up on me. Jeez la-weez.
Okay, snit fit over.
Beyond that, it's up to the patient to monitor the drugs used, determine when a refill is needed, and call the pharmacy. Since drugs are filled electronically, the pharmacy will refill if there are refills ordered, and if not, will contact the issuing doctor to get a new script.
It's a good idea when you get a new script to diary ahead a few weeks before that bottle of pills will run out, and order before it does. I color code pill refill expirations in my medical calendar, using a different colored pen than for Dad's medical appointments and mine.
What good news did you have?